Ouch!
I got a sizable chunk of nut from my muesli stuck right at the back of my mouth.
Biting down on it hard but using my gum, not my molar.
What kind of idiot am I? Why can’t I chew properly? Who put that nut in there? Why don’t I have a tooth there?
The judgments fly out like uncaged pigeons.
But how much attention was I giving to the spoon before shoveling its contents in?
How sensitive was I to the size, hardness, and variety of ingredients before biting down with all my might?
Not very.
I’m expecting my gum to play the role of a tooth and then complaining about the ineffective and painful outcome.
The gum is very good at holding my teeth in place, but not so good and chopping nuts.
It was a shock when I saw the implications of this.
What other faculties am I misusing and then complaining about?
One thing immediately sprang to mind: my connection with other people, and all living things.
If I use my ordinary thinking mind - which is trained to see differences, draw comparisons, judge as superior or inferior, logical or illogical - then I’m not likely to focus on common ground.
I’m more interested in being right, getting outside approval to confirm my view, and then maintaining this position.
I often use our cat Luna as an example of how to connect to life without the mind. We feel her presence, her warmth, enjoy her attention, and her sometimes erratic behavior.
Sometimes she doesn’t want to be with us and that’s OK. We love her just as she is.
So when I find myself trying to think my way into a deeper understanding of life, grappling with the biggest questions, trying to understand why someone behaves in that baffling way,
Maybe I can ask - am I using the right tool for this?
Our thinking minds are brilliant - at some things
Maybe true intelligence is seeing what those things are and what things intuition, sensitivity, feeling, and allowing are better at.
If you’re feeling stuck it’s a great sign you’re using the wrong tool.
Message me and we can look at this closely and compassionately - and allow new wisdom to reveal the way forward.
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